The Sunshine on my Rainy world
by IchixHimeFan
Summary: Ichigo nightmares has been haunting him for two months, ever since the Hueco Mundo thing. Actually, its more of Orihime leaving him, has been haunting him. He finally had enough and ran to Orihime to let go of so much pain that he went through his whole life.


**(A/N) - Heyyy IchixHime Fan fans, wassup ? Okay, so I wrote this story earlier today because it has been on the edge of my mind this whole week, and I wanted to just put it out there. I will be updating my other story -forgot its name, but whatever- sooner than later. Uhm... ****Well, there's nothing really to say, except I hope you have a enjoyable time to read this Ichihime story. So... yeah.**

**-Enjoy !**

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Red. That was all I could see: blood. My vision was blurry but I knew what I seeing. I knew what I was seeing, but my body didn't know what it was feeling. My body was entirely numb and I didn't feel like doing anything to try to wake it up. Despite most of my senses close to gone, I did have my inner-feelings intact. But they were also closed to gone, too.

"Ichigo Kurosaki, do you finally give up?" the voice taunted me.

I gripped what I thought felt like Zangetsu hilt. I wanted my body to get up and move, but I didn't. I had a thought that maybe I'm just being lazy, that maybe I'm giving up. As soon as that thought crossed my mind, I dismissed it just as quick. I couldn't, I knew I couldn't give up. I just couldn't give up, at least not on her. Not on my life and support. Not on my healer. Not on my sunshine, the only thing that made the rain stopped falling, stop the rain from continue falling on my world. Not on Orihime.

"I will repeat this one more time, Kurosaki: do you give up?"

I couldn't help but mutter, "Give up?" The words sounded so remote when I said them aloud. Still gripping Zangetsu, I somehow willed my hand to move to my chest, over my chest. I was wondering if I could consider that thought. Could I?

"Yes, give up," his voice drawled. His voice sounded far, yet so close. "I am merely curious, Kurosaki. I wonder, do you give up on living? Do you give up trying so hard to beat me? Do you give up on your friends and family?" His voice quieted for a moment until I heard a chuckle. "Or, is it that… you give up on fighting for that woman? Orihime Inoue?"

I tensed as he said her name, Orihime's name. I couldn't, no, I couldn't let her leave me. I couldn't give up, not now, not on Orihime. I gasped when I was hit with a massive wave of physical and heart-breaking pain. I had to get up, for Orihime. I already lost my mom, and I couldn't… let Orihime leave me, not like my mom did.

Then, that voice came through my thoughts.

**_'_****I**'m curious, too, Ichigo: I thought you made a promise to that women. A promise saying that you'd protect her, no matter what.'

I briefly wondered on why my hollow would care about me protecting Orihime.

_'Yes, Ichigo. I agree, also.'_ Old man too? _'Are you going to break your promise to that girl because you're being lazy? I must say Ichigo, I am disappointed in you. I honestly thought that you'd stay by your promise, but even now, I could sense your hesitation. Your hesitation and doubts is having effect on this world.'_

Zangetsu sentence shocked me. Hesitation? Doubts? That can't be, I can't have doubts on protecting Orihime. No! That can't be right. He must be lying, he'd have to. I grit my teeth, 'What are you talking about? I'm not having doubts on protecting Orihime, you bastards! I'll protect her no matter what.' But, wasn't I just arguing with myself on giving up? None of this makes sense now.

_**'Ha, you will never learn, will ya Ichigo! You feel it, don't ya! The heaviness, the doubts, all of it. Its practically vibrating through your whole damn body! You do want to give up; you just don't want to admit it.'**_

I shut my eyes tightly, "No! That can't be true! Dammit, shut up!"

"Huh, oh, what is this, Kurosaki? I wasn't even talking and yet I'm getting yelled at?" I could practically feel Aizen grin crawl up my spine, "Or is it that you're having a discussion with your hollow and your Zanpakutou?"

I turned my head to yell at him, "Dammit, I said shut up! I'm not talking to you!" I groaned as I felt myself kneeling down on one knee.

'_**Hey! But, Ichigo, ya wanna know what you're scared to admit?'**_

'No! Didn't I say shut up dammit?! I'm not scared to admit anything, damn hollow!' But, he didn't listen. His evil voice kept creeping in my head.

_**'You'**_r**_e scared to admit that you're scared. Scared to protect her, scared of getting killed. I don't know how, but you're even scared of this prick, Aizen, aren't you?'_** Huh, that couldn't be. The time I would be scared of Aizen would be the time Hell freeze over._** 'You're scared that maybe you can't keep your promise. Scared that you aren't strong enough to protect yourself and her. You're losing hope enough to the point that it may never even exist in you again. Because look up Ichigo.'**_

His words shocked me but I did what I was told. I looked up to see Aizen, standing in front of me, grinning. Grinning as if he had the whole world in his hands. But, behind him was her. She was on all four, on the ground, and looking at me with big, beautiful, teary eyes. Her mouth was slightly parted and there was a brief thought that wanted to kissed those lips. I looked back to her eyes and was shocked. It was there and I had seen it: the trust, the hopefulness, the confidence, and the faith that was there from the start, gone. It was gone, I realized, all of it. Everything, everything was gone. I could see it in her eyes, the guilt. The guilt of not believing in me anymore, and that was when my chest tightens. She didn't believe in me anymore.

**_'Do you see it, now, Ichigo?'_**

It was then I realized why Aizen was grinning: he didn't hold the whole world in his hand, he held my world in his hand. But he didn't crush it. It was I. I crushed it. I crushed my whole damn world, didn't I?

Aizen broke through my thoughts, "So, I see you've found on now, Kurosaki." I watched as he turned around, to go to Orihime. "I see you've finally realized, Kurosaki."

"No," I whispered. I stretched out a hand but couldn't even make the attempt to move to her. "Orihime," I whispered.

Aizen moved closer and closer to Orihime, stopping when he was beside her. He then turned to look at me with cold eyes and I felt the ice freezing over my heart. 'Don't touch her, please,' I begged in my head over and over again.

He kneeled down beside her but didn't touch her. I stared into her eyes, the eyes of a warm-hearted person who stopped believing. Without her saying, she gave me the message through her gray eyes: Protect. You couldn't protect me.

"Kurosaki." I snapped my eyes to Aizen and felt the anger and sadness boiling inside me. The damn hollow was right, I am losing hope, and I'm losing hope because she stopped believing in me.

"Orihime, do you see it?" Aizen asked and Orihime stopped looking at me. "Orihime, do you now see how weak your protector is?"

My eyes widen as she nodded. Her eyes had grown into gray hollows and her voice was empty and monotone as she spoke. She got up and stood up, beside Aizen. "Yes, Lord Aizen, I do see how weak he is."

The words were enough to bring rain into my inner-world. My heart felt as if it had stopped beating, and maybe it did. I dropped Zangetsu, out of shock. I then fell back to the ground, hard, as if somebody finally impaled their sword in me. My body felt numb and distatched. My mind was filled with nothing but fuzzy memories of the girl I love, walking away from me.

_**'See, you are scared, Ichigo. This is what you were exactly scared of,' my hollows voice sounded gone yet there.**_

The voice echoed as I got what he said: scared of… scared of… Ichigo Kurosaki, you are after all, scared.

"Kurosaki," his voice stopped me more. I made a small movement to turn to the side to see him and her ready to walk through a Garganta. "Kurosaki, I want you to listen very carefully to what she says. For this may be the last words you will ever hear."

Orihime spoke and looked at me with empty eyes, "Thank you for everything you've done for me, Ichigo. This will be the last time we speak, but this will also be the last time we see each. For you will die here in Hueco Mundo, you should die happily." I listen to her words as my heart cried, painfully in my chest.

She turned around and I watched as her burnt-orange hair swish behind her like a beautiful silk curtain. "Maybe, someday, Ichigo… Maybe, someday we will reunite again, Ichigo. You have done good things for your world, the human world. So, I don't expect to really ever see you again, Kurosaki." She was almost into the Garganta with Aizen and my heart cried out to her chest. But, I stay silent. "Thank you, Kurosaki Ichigo. And goodbye." And gone she went.

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I hopped out from the window and onto the house across from mine. It was raining, yet I didn't care. It was that nightmare again, that damned nightmare that's been haunting me for two whole damn months. Ever since we came from the damn Hueco Mundo, its been haunting me. Every damn night, it been haunting me. Of Orihime leaving me. I couldn't do it, I couldn't bear the thought of Orihime leaving me.

The damn voice even haunted me, as if it was a vivid reality:_ 'For if you will die here in Hueco Mundo, you should die happily,' 'Maybe, someday, Ichigo… Maybe, someday we'll reunite again, Ichigo…' _and even,_ 'So, I don't really expect to see you again, Kurosaki… '_

I grit my teeth as I continued jumping from house to house. I couldn't see with all this rain, plus it was dark, too. Despite I could still feel her reiatsu, I still need her with me, in my arms. I need to feel her. I thought I could just deal and tolerate the nightmares, maybe even control them, but damn was I wrong. Damn it! Orihime.

When I got to her apartment, I knocked on the door. I was dripping wet and cold but none of that matter, I just need her in my arms, now. I know I was being crazy bothering her in the middle of the night, but that didn't matter, also. I was about to knock again until the door opened and revealed a small girl with pale skin, burnt-orange hair, and tired gray eyes.

As soon as she opened the door, not even fully, I pushed open the door and grabbed her in my arms. I held the small girl in my arms, tightly, as if she might disappear if I don't hold her tight enough. I heard her gasp, but didn't really care of what I was doing.

"I-Ichigo, w-what are you doing?" She grabbed the front of my haori in small fists but didn't push away.

I didn't respond to her, only holding her tightly. I could feel the warmness vibrating from her, the calefaction in her voice, and the faith she had in me.

"I-Ichigo, is something wrong? Are you okay?"

"I," my voice cracked when I spoke. "Y-you're alive." My heart warmed at that fact. I pushed her head into my chest, more, and bowed my head onto her orange hair. I took a long inhale, the strawberry scent filling my nostrils. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew that I was getting her wet but could care less. If she were here, that would be enough.

"I-Ichigo," she gripped my haori. "P-Please, I can't b-breathe."

Surprised at how tight I was holding her, I reluctantly let her go but didn't let her get far. There was only an inch dividing our bodies, and to be honest, I didn't expect even letting her go that far.

She shifted into a comfortable spot in my arms, in the rain. "Is there something wrong, Ichigo?"

The concern rained in on my heart but it was good. "I'm fine, Orihime. Just let me continue holding you, like this." I paused, "I need reassurance."

"I-Ichigo?"

"Yeah, what is it Orihime?" I asked.

"It's fine if I reassure you, but we're getting wet staying out here in the rain. Do you mind if we go into my house? You're soaking wet, Ichigo."

I reluctantly complied to her request but didn't let her go far into the small apartment. She closed the door after I came in and that was when I tackled her. I wrap my arms around her as she stumbled to the back of the door. "I-Ichigo!" she cried.

With her in my arms and me in hers, we slid down the door together. I felt as if I was releasing so many bottled-up emotions with the small girl in my arms. Old and new. It was then I noticed the tears that welled in my eyes and fell over on her head. How long has it been since I cried? 8 years? 9?

I cried in Orihime's arm. Orihime gasp, "Ichigo," she muttered. I knew I was being weak. But, I was thinking of all the hurt and pain I endured throughout the years. It was too much, too much to bear, even for me.

I tightened my arm around her waist and switched to a position where I was leaning against the wall with her hugged against my chest. Orihime held onto me tightly. She tried to push back to get a look at me, but I didn't want her to see her protector breaking down in front of her.

"Ichigo, please let me see you," her small voice was filled with pleading that I couldn't resist her. I loosen my grip on her as she lift her head to look at me with gray eyes. I was surprised when she simply smiled at me; it wasn't the reaction that I was expecting -which I really didn't know what reaction I expected of her. "Ichigo."

Her voice broke through to me and I cried in her hair, the tears slid down my face, and I could feel the relief of warmness overpowering the sad, coldness I felt during my days of fighting. It was Orihime, I realized. Orihime could only do this to a man: make them break their facade and come to her for reassurance.

She changed our positions, her leaning against the wall now. I was then surprised when she pulled my head down and into her lap. Instantly, I wrapped my arms around her small waist as she ran a hand through my hair. I cried into her lap like a small child who lost a fight against a girl and ran to his mommy crying. That memory. It was that memory that made me realize, now. I then realized why I ran to Orihime. It wasn't because of the nightmares; it wasn't that I was scared, although those were a factor. I realized why I felt the attraction to Orihime and not anyone else. It took me long but I realized that Orihime is my mom.

I looked up with teary brown eyes at Orihime. I watched her features through blurry eyes. Of course, there was a difference between Orihime and my mom. Rather than Orihime having brown pretty eyes, she had gray eyes. But those gray eyes held the same thing that my mom held in hers: love. And rather than her long, wavy brown hair, Orihime had long, wavy burnt-orange hair. Other than those mere differences and the body type that had, Orihime was still my mother. Well a reincarnation of her at least. And they were beautiful nonetheless.

Orihime ran a hand through my hair with a smile adorning her face and humming a random tune. She looked into my eyes, "Ichigo, it's alright to cry sometimes. You are only 17 and a boy, even a hero like you, does need rest sometimes." I couldn't tell if I was hearing Orihime's voice or my mother, they were sounding so much alike. "It's okay to cry in front of me, Ichigo. Actually, in fact, that wouldn't make you weak Ichigo, that would only make you stronger. You don't have to keep your facade up only to protect everyone, because…" she smiled and I thought for a moment I had seen the sun, "The true secret to protecting somebody else, is to protect yourself."

I looked, shockingly, at Orihime. I couldn't even try to wrap my brain around that. I wondered how not even that came to mind. I sighed in Orihime's lap as I found out the answer: I was worried about my pride. Orihime giggled, a sound that made my insides tingle.

_I stopped, out of breath, from fighting._

_Do you know the feeling?_

_I can't find the way, on_

_I can't find the way, on my own._

_My pride will kill, if I don't ask for help._

_The strong bond between our hearts,_

_Will never melt away._

_We had searched and arrived here,_

_We will put a period in this place._

_If I stop, tell me you will keep going._

_But when my vision turns blurry, you were there._

_Did your heart race, looking for me? Mine did._

_Close, so close._

_With the courage to not look away,_

_And stand and face the truth._

_I'll turn sadness and anger into strength._

_Destiny is right beside me._

_Look at what lies beyond,_

_A shining world._

_If I lay down, please come get me._

_Be my support._

_For a future which we live together,_

_I'll put a period in this place._

_Come for me._

Orihime voice than had me dozing off into her arms. But, I didn't go to sleep without whispering, "Goodnight Orihime. I... love you." The last thing I heard was a gasp before I was into a deep, peaceful nightmare-free doze.

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**(A/N) - So, how do you like the story, sweet and cute, right? To be honest, I always wanted to do a fanfic where Ichigo cry since y'kno he's the hero and he haven't cried since his mother. Oh, and I compare Masaki and Orihime together, because in the manga they do honestly look like twins soooo I made Orihime as a 'reincarnation' of Masaki. Since they are both so cute. Well, guess I'd be going, now. See you later, I'll update soon, and... yeah.**

**Oh, and if you guys noticed, I actually changed my name from Ichihimefan to... IchixHimeFan. Since this is like the first time I wrote using this name, it is harder for me to put my new name than old name. And... yeah, whatever, *blah blah blah* Well, whatever...**

**Goodbye my dear IchixHimeFan fans. Until next time...**


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